There must have been an unexpected surplus of red and pink velour at the useless item factory

Want a tacky pillow? Then come on down to Five Below, where you can also find ugly hair things, enough candy to give you a cavity just by looking at it, DVDs that no one wants, and random shit that the dump turned away!

A great way to let your guests know that not only are you super chill and “go with the flow,” you also have a love of dice/gambling problem/no taste.

“Do not keep out! Enter.” Am I reading this correctly?

Uh…no it is not! And with this pillow you are one step closer!*

*To having a problem